Oh, midlife.
I’ve shared bits and pieces of my midlife unraveling over the past few years, but the truth is — I wasn’t prepared for how destabilizing it would feel.
It felt like the rug got pulled out from under me.
Like my North Star disappeared overnight.
And suddenly I was stuck in a quiet panic of What now? — with no map and no motivation.
I had done all the things you’re “supposed” to do:
• College
• A doctorate in chiropractic
• Moving around the U.S.
• Falling in love and getting married
• Building a successful coaching business
• Helping hundreds of people with their health — and later, their businesses
• Traveling
• Buying my dream house in the mountains
And then…
Now what?
I knew there was more I wanted to do.
I’m ambitious. I’m capable. I have ideas and visions.
But what became painfully clear was this:
Even though I had created outward success, what had motivated me before was no longer aligned with who I had become.
The old drivers stopped working.
The old goals felt hollow.
And trying to “push through” felt impossible — and honestly, out of integrity.
Where I felt this most was in my work.
I had created the dream we’re sold everywhere online — freedom, flexibility, meaningful work, financial success — and still something felt off.
It was unsettling.
And at times, pretty dark.
I felt lost, overwhelmed, and strangely frozen — like something inside me was trying to emerge, but I couldn’t access it.
What I didn’t know then was this:
Midlife isn’t a breakdown.
It’s a threshold.
And over the next few emails, I want to share what this threshold revealed for me — and what actually helped me move forward in a way that felt real, embodied, and honest.
If you’re in a similar season — especially if your work or sense of direction feels off — you’re not alone.
And you’re not broken.